Bullying at Daycare?

What would you do if you witnessed 3 and 4 year olds bully your 3/4 year old? What if one of the bullying children's parents was in the room? What if that parent was the teacher?

What would you do if your toddler came home and told you the other kids 'did not like the bow in her hair'?

What would you do if you were talking to your toddler about her day at school, and the friends she made, and she states that one of the girls (not the ones mentioned above) told her she did not like her, and your toddler could not tell you why?

My Little Brat started attending a new learning center 2 weeks ago....she has been attending a center near where we work since she was 8 months old...about 3 years total! She made a lot of great friends, male and female....dropping her off was always a treat....her friends would run up and give hugs, yelling "RANDI!"....all the kids seemed so accepting and caring and well supervised, although at times, chaotic....the teachers seemed to be in the middle of everything tho, and were pretty strict about complete acceptance of EVERYONE...there was one boy in particular that comes to mind that was not as well developed as his peers, and on the aggressive side, and the teachers did all they could to be sure he fit in with his peers...whether it was adjustments to his behavior, or to the other children's attitudes....

We made the decision to move her to a center closer to home with heavy hearts...we knew it was necessary though, because she needed to be at a center that could transport her to kindergarten....we were also hoping she would make friends with some of the same kids she would be going to school with....I toured the school and it really seemed top of the line....it was a new center, with a 'school' type approach to daycare...the kids all have home-rooms, and then travel to various classes throughout the day...they have an inside gym, an outside gym, and even a pool where they all get summer swim lessons! The only drawback, it seemed, was that we have to pack her lunch each day, and she has to wear a uniform shirt....both of which she is COMPLETELY ecstatic about! LOL

Day 1 concerned me though....When I went to drop her off, neither teacher in the room made any effort to introduce her to the other children...they were already broken off into their groups, playing, and none of them even acknowledged her....awkward! So, like any good parent wanting to ease their child's discomfort, I took the initiative to walk LB around and introduce her to the other children as the teachers talked btwn themselves....not a good start, but I tried to let it go....

A couple days later, I am tying a pink bow in Randi's hair for school....Normally, this is something she likes very much.....but now she was concerned....she confesses the other girls teased her about her bow....my heart breaks....in all her time at her old daycare, she NEVER told me about any teasing going on, and I certainly never witnessed any.....

A few days after that, I drop her off, and again, all the kids have broken off into play groups....there were 3 girls dancing to music, and Randi wanted to join in....as she approached the dance area 2 of the girls scowled at her and said "you can't dance with us!"....GASP! My heart sank to the bottom of the ocean! How COULD they??!!! So I glance over at the teacher (also the mother of one of the two girls), and she is oblivious.....so I encourage Randi to go ahead and dance "the dance floor is big enough for everyone"....but she was obviously unwelcome, and just sort of stood at the edge of the area wiggling her sad little booty.....it was heart wrenching....finally, the teacher looked over and saw Randi on the outskirts and told her to go dance with the other girls....I left at that point, as I couldn't bare to see any more rejection that day....

A few days after that I am talking to the LB about her friends at school, and asking her their names and what they like to play....she goes on to tell me all about ANOTHER girl that "doesn't like me", but can't tel me why?!?!?!

MY conclusion, based on what I have seen and heard to date, is that there must be very little supervision of the children at this learning center....in the last 3 years I witnessed many children corrected for bad attitudes or bad behavior, which created a warm an accepting environment for all the kids....the teachers were hands on and very interactive...I believe that is what this new center may be lacking....I have not witnessed, in the 2 weeks that I have been dropping her off and picking her up, any 'hands-on' interaction with the children....close supervision that would nip this bullying and bad attitudes in the bud....they are TOO YOUNG to be allowed to be so divisive.....

The center does have parent/teacher conferences coming up....I do intend on bringing up these concerns at that time....I am just wondering if anyone else has had similar issues??? I can understand that there is an adjustment time for everyone to make friends, but all this negativity? I don't see where that is acceptable at all....thoughts????

Happy Trails,
Leah

UPDATE: On good advice, I went ahead and spoke to the "Principal" of Randi's new school....I am happy to say she was very comforting, supportive, and stated that she would talk to the teachers TODAY!